I'd be happy if I could read my own mind.
It'd be a lot easier having relationships, as I think a great deal but can't say most of it and I wish I could. If people could read my mind I wouldn't have to, though! People wouldn't waste time with others who thought nasty things about them - obviously everyone dislikes a few things about each other, but it would be impossible to keep genuine 'dislike' or 'hate' a secret. Life would be more open with no secrets. You wouldn't have to ask awkward questions because you'd already know the answers. People would like and understand each other much more...
|Paranoid Personality Disorder:||Low|
|Schizoid Personality Disorder:||Moderate|
|Schizotypal Personality Disorder:||High|
|Antisocial Personality Disorder:||Low|
|Borderline Personality Disorder:||Very High|
|Histrionic Personality Disorder:||Moderate|
|Narcissistic Personality Disorder:||Low|
|Avoidant Personality Disorder:||Very High|
|Dependent Personality Disorder:||Very High|
-- Take the Personality Disorder Test --
-- Personality Disorder Info --
I did good.
Also, nobody asked me my name or said hello, or asked how I was. I thought that was a bit cold. I thought Buddhists were meant to be compassionate and caring?
The people seemed ok in general though... The first meeting of the month is to induct newcomers. There was me and two men, but they had already done some meditating before elsewhere.
At the end we had tea and biscuits - no coffee available though. They had a brief chat about wishy washy inconsequential nonsense. One guy seemed especially pretentious, and was saying he didn't think the solitude of meditation would be beneficial to those with mental health difficulties or depression! I guess meditation is about emptying your mind and not passing judgement on the thoughts that come to mind - having a neutral outlook. Whereas the therapies used to treat depression focus more on positive thinking - finding the positive side to the thoughts rather than just letting them pass by.
Anyway, the guy leading the group agreed with him and said the group wasn't really able to help depressed people and they should get professional help.
I didn't say anything during the entire meeting, except a few words when I was being taught how to sit. Never mind. Its an experience. At least I didn't fart.
- Current Mood: okay
I knew, ever since that day
The reason you had approached me
Tender and soft
That my body is to your taste
To you hunger filled eyes
How does my body seem?
If you are to eat me, do it in one blow
So that the meat does not get hard
- Current Mood: blah
Yesterday I was giving my dog some chocolate buttons (special ones designed for dogs, because real chocolate is poisonous for them) They were stored in a jar, but I'd read the packaging earlier and it said that they were safe to eat if consumed accidentally by a child. Anyway, I told this to my mum as I was giving one to the dog and said it would be mean to tease him by eating one in front of him. I also mentioned how divine they smelt - much better than real chocolate buttons. My mum then dared me to eat one., so I did. It was fairly disgusting and as I chewed, I realised it might not be vegetarian. Seeking to check the ingredients, I looked at the label on the jar. I read aloud, in horror, "Ingredients: Rawhide 100%!!!!!" Then I realised that the jar was originally for some rawhide chews and that the choco buttons had been taken out of their original packet.
Ok, I just found the ingredients online.
"Good Boy Choc Drops" ingredients: HPKO/HPO, whey powder, dried flour, sugar, dicalcium phosphate, cocoa powder, carob flour, crill 41, vitamin premix, lecithin, crester PR, cream flavor, chocolate flavor, vanilla flavor and saccharin.
That doesn't sound too bad at all actually and I think its vegetarian. Maybe I'll try another. It might grow on me.
- Current Mood: sad
Mr Country Bumpkin humped his sister's pumpkin.
There's even a cleaner version, for children:
Mr Country Bumpkin kissed his sister's pumpkin.
Aren't I thoughtful? I hope you appreciate that, because I lost a whole night's sleep with that phrase going through my head - perfecting its poetic value.
I remember my year 9 form teacher suggesting a rhyme for 'purple': A fart won't do it but a burp'll.
I can't think of one for 'orange' though...Is there a rhyme for 'silver' either?
- Current Location:Bed
- Current Mood: bored
A while ago, after getting off the bus in town, I noticed an advert on the window of New Look. It was a full length photo of a girl without any pants and at the bottom it said '12 to 16 years' (or a similar age range, certainly below 18). At closer inspection you could see she was wearing a 1 inch skirt. I immediately felt the sexual nature of it though...I don't think I was turned on, but I felt it was distinctly sexual. She was about 60% leg - long, slim, plasticy, child-like, hairless legs.
She obviously wouldn't be able to sit down or walk properly without it rising any higher - as if it isn't indecent enough already. Its possible that the model is over 18, but she is implied to advertise a range of clothes for young teenagers. If someone was found to downloading photos like that on their PC, they'd be sacked. Its blatant pornography.
Clothes like that aren't just aimed at teens though. They have short skirts, 'fashionable' clothes and even bras for kids under 10. I've seen toddlers wearing bikini tops...why?
I'm going to my meditation class this evening and I think I'm going to write on that poster. I don't agree with vandalism, but I'll only be writing on top of child pornography, which deserves to be vandalised. I think its behind the glass actually...it'll be too glossy to write on and the window cleaners will have to wash it off. Perhaps I'll just write on a piece of paper and sellotape it on. It'll be taken off almost immediately I expect, but hopefully it'll encourage someone to think.
OK, now this is really disgusting:
Its called the Lolita Baby Bikini.
"Lolita (1955) is a novel by Vladimir Nabokov, first written in English and published in 1955 in Paris, later translated by the author into Russian and published in 1958 in New York. The book is both internationally famous for its innovative style and infamous for its controversial subject: the narrator and protagonist, Humbert Humbert, becomes obsessed and sexually involved with a 12-year-old girl named Dolores Haze.
After its publication, Lolita attained a classic status, becoming one of the best known and most controversial examples of 20th century literature. The name "Lolita" has entered pop culture to describe a sexually precocious young girl. The novel was adapted to film in 1962 and again in 1997."
Basically, the book is about an adult man who abuses a 12 year old girl.
And yet, Lolita is now used as a name to describe a seductive, manipulating girl. In other words, it is the child's fault that she was abused because she was being seductive. This was mentioned in detail in the book I just read called 'Anticlimax' by Sheila Jefferys.
So this advert is advertising a bikini for a 'sexually precocious young girl' who is about 3 years old.
I can't even express how disgusting and injust this is.
Recently, I was looking around a book shop and I found a book called "BITCH". I had a look and it claimed to be a feminist book - there were quotes on the back congratulating it on being a modern, feminist perspective! In the front page it said something like, "Discovering the Lolita in all women." The synopsis on Amazon says: "The history of sexually manipulative women from biblical times to today. "
Follow this link to read some of the praise written on the back...:
I actually feel physically sick now. This is feminism?!?!?!?! Holy shit! This is anything BUT feminism!!!
I'm gonna go and throw up and cry in despair for the human race. I hope those reptilians have more sense, because by god if a war breaks out I ain't supporting this side.
- Current Mood: aggravated
When I was a kid, I used to want to marry a snake. I would be able to communicate with it via telepathy. It would protect me and obey me. We would be an effortlessly perfect team. It would come up silently and coil around me when I called it psycically. I would have cool, sexy fantasies about it. I used to think about French kissing snakes as well. I've always liked snakes... I was born in the Chinese year of the snake, 1989.
I think I'm going to try to convince people on Youtube that I'm a reptilian alien. There are people who believe that these snakey aliens are running the world. If I just say, "Hey, I'm a reptilian" they'll realise I'm just taking the piss. However, if I tell the tales of my snake fantasies, I could pretend I don't know that I'm an alien (not that I am an alien *shifty eyes*)...They might think I'm confused because I'm a hybrid.
- Current Location:Bed (I never leave it)
- Current Mood: contemplative